I hate feeling like this I'm so tired of trying to fight this I'm asleep and all I dream of Is waking to you Tell me that you will listen Your touch is what I'm missing And the more I hide I realize I'm slowly losing you I'll never wake up without an overdose of you I hate living without you Dead wrong to ever doubt you But my demons lay in waiting Tempting me away Oh how I adore you Oh how I thirst for you Oh how I need you
~Death~
I wish that i could wake up this horror is not what i expected its less than terrible Which may be a nightmare Someone wake me up Im living a nightmare My life Is nothing without you in it I need you to live someone save me from myself deep down i know that this may end up being my time of dieing
~My Mind~
My heart feels weak for my mind wonders on. Dark paths await with lustfull hate and no way to return. My savior yields broken wings that shown no light on my journey. Darkness and a promise that death awaits. This keeps me going. For to kill what does not exist is to take razors to your mind. And killing is wrong but this is hard for me to dream of a world where people are not killing me. I cry only to embrace the pain as fear spills from my veins.
~Violence~
Is this anger that housed in my shell I hide, Normal beyond a doubt or will it subside? A violent entity, I have always been but is this anger too much? Everyone has their vices, why can't they see that it's my crutch?
Is it wrong for me to defend my own honor? Without this aggression I'd be just another goner. It kept me sane, it kept me alive. It made me whole, it made me strive.
Take me for me, or leave me to seclusion. Other than accepting there can be no resolution. I am what I am, please just cope. Because I can't be your winter, walking on a tightrope.
~Breaking Away~
My head is pounding with all of this stress how am i supposed to get out of this mess Its been the same for years and it isnt getting better I told him in writing but he never got the letter
Hes a living time bomb thats about to explode whenever hes down he turns to me to offload His hearts full of anger,his eyes full of tears I know its time to conquer my fears.
I married an angel,the best of the guys little did i know hes the devil in disguise two years off happiness,our love was thriving but the last two years were full of crying and hiding.
I'm all cried out and at the end of my tether We need to break free of this nightmare together will he be ok?with me not around will he rise and become stronger,or weaken to the ground.
I guess this is the risk that i have to take if not for me than for my children's sake I have found a strength that he cant attack with my head held high ill be fighting back I am walking away ...and I'm never looking BACK.
~Im Crazy~
I know when I'm done writing this it wont make any sense because the thoughts thats in my head are really hard or dense
my mind is so messed up my mind is so crazy my thoughts are not in order my thoughts are really hazy
nothing in my head is finished i cant think straight i cant remember anything not even todays date
its really hard to focus its like i really cant i keep saying "concentrate" like its some kind of chant
i can see letters & numbers but their always upside down or i see them backward or jumping all around
i try to put it together to fix the puzzle in my mind but when i think to long my mind goes into overdrive
then everything stops and everything stands still i start to feel light headed like i took too many pills
~My Life, in Your arms tonight~
The color dissipates from my eyes; also with it the glow, Along with that my heart lessens and shrinks to a minuscule low. It's in your hands, it's in your arms; my life as time quickens, Will you choose to do the right thing as my blood thickens at my hair's ends? You look left you look right, no one around to help me themselves, The duty is in your hands...why hesitate? Why look for someone else? We're here alone as my heart lessens even more to a beat every four seconds, If there's something to do it's time to do it now before my time slowly ticks away again.
But wait, why are you leaving? Turning your back on me I see, I was left in your care and you walk away, make haste, and leave. Now I lay here alone, with no one to help or care for me, I was left in your arms dying...and you weren't there for me. This has to be the end, as my breath breathes no more My life, was left in your arms...I hope you remember that forever more.
~Dreams~
When the light fades to dark then the truth can be seen once the light blinds it leaves a dark dream
from the darkness eyes appear their faces invisible and unclear voices mumble but cannot hear my curiosity suddenly turns to fear
Somewhere, over the rainbow, way up high. There's a land that I heard of once in a lullaby. Somewhere, over the rainbow, skies are blue. And the dreams that you dare to dream Really do come true.
awaken to have my vision gray colors of the rainbow begin to decay lifeless the world has become the feeling of happiness, now is numb
darkness returns with a clear face beautiful, radiant i begin to embrace the darkness now resides within me a mind of its own, controlling entity
all i want is to be free from what will soon be the death of me to rest and sleep peacefully without the darkness haunting me
Somewhere, over the rainbow, way up high. There's a land that I heard of once in a lullaby. Somewhere, over the rainbow, skies are blue. And the dreams that you dare to dream Really do come true.
consumed by the evil within yang fades from consuming yin numb, blind and desperately cold strangled by darkness' choke hold
from this dream i cannot awake its all too real, i hesitate is my life worth it, i debate ultimately i succumb to my fate
i think of my happy place instead of my shameful disgrace but the image turns to black no escaping this nightmare attack
Somewhere, over the rainbow, way up high. There's a land that I heard of once in a lullaby. Somewhere, over the rainbow, skies are blue. And the dreams that you dare to dream Really do come true.
~Demons Whisper~
Demons whisper, as darkness falls. They're everywhere and want your call. They taunt you and make you see things. That you thought could only be seen in dreams. This life is full of decisions and heartache and pain. It's easy to be insane and take advantage of everything. All that you worked for can be taken away. Your dreams can disappear and reality can fade into place. You're tempted left and right, it's up to you to stay straight. You can fall to hell, you can raise to heaven. You can decide if you want to be damned or be saved. Demons whisper, their voice persuades.
~The Unseen~
As darkness engulfs my heart; remember me tonight.
I once counted sheep-- bloodied; and yet alive. Backward minds sleep awake in moonlight. Tick, tock.
Hidden helm of darkness, a shadow in my chamber. Your eyes a cleft in earth -I do not want your pomegranate seed.
"My love, You must return to once you came for your sake and mine."
and with that he hid pomegranate seeds upon his lips that night.
"She begged me to take her."
Now, we count sheep-- bloodied; am I alive?
Only one season; are we to entwine.
Tick.. ..Tock.
~Innocence~
She crys for help, she mercys the pain shes lyes on the ground blood mixed with rain bruises are swelled acheing her legs. clothes are ripped they look like rags no shoes no socks; feet in the cold she tried so hard to be strong and bold inside the skin aches more then out the voice inside her head screams and shouts her ears ring nothing to hear she wants to run from the fear she cannot walk though she couldnt at all everytime she tried she'd trip and fall cigarette burns and piss in her hand nothing in her mouth but mud and sand trembling and shaking her sobs cant hide trying so hard to open her eyes wide they left her alone noone can hear alone in a field noone near she tries to scream but her voice is unheard they told her and told her to not say a word bruises from bats, cuts from a knife imagine the day before she had a life she was innocent she was poor she was a virgin before they tore
~Regrets~
Regrets are left unsaid written down but unread try to ignore whats the past but cant seem, to at last it ruins lives and causes alot of pain nothing people can regain tears over flow happiness hides glowing rebounds sadness glides mad frustrated confused and lost pain seems to be, the only cost a scar on your heart that doesnt go away what ever you do you know you wont say no matter how long it takes to forget theres always going to be that one regret
~Wake up~
I woke up, With a smile on my face, The sun greeted me, In the most cheerful way.
This day is worth every moment, 'Cause there's a friend waiting for you, To let you forget the pains of yesterday, And help you find that delicious fruit.
There's a friend willing to stay, A friend who'll take the hurt away.
I woke up smiling because of you, I knew you would be there, As you always do.
~The hole in my Chest~
Clean and bright, the sun shines through my chest, and the gaping hole you have left there. the beauty of it, of you, of my love for you, it's killing me.
i can try and hold myself together, but beams of dusty light still stream through gaps. i can't fill myself when you're away. and soon i swear i will collapse without your strength close to hold me together.
~Used to be~
There used to be a day where we never left eachother's side You were my sister and i was yours. There use to be only the one person to make me smile. But then something happened. We started to get older. I liked black and you liked pink You were all over screaming at football games And I would sit and try to tame your wild ways I tried to listen to your boy problems hours on end. Then one day you stopped calling. And we stoped talking I got in with a different crowd, You started wearing little mini skirts. Just remember even if we're not hearts in life We are at heart For now and forever
~The Art of Time~
As time slips by I will miss you the most my friends and my teachers Their voices and faces Their humor and kindness Their knowledge and experience and their support
I'm Afraid I will Forget lost in my mind wanting to be found I will miss you the most the oh so precious times we've had All throughout the past years we've had good and we've had bad I wish time would stand still to keep these memories from fading away after this we'll all go our separate ways finding ourselves in that path that we are meant to find
Sorry, i just want to save the link for one of the pics above, so im gonna post it here.... http://media.photobucket.com/image/creepy%20anime/liene333/anime/1b18097a.jpg?o=30
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